I’ll say up front that this will be a work-in-progress. I’ve never done group spiritual formation entirely online in a forum so I don’t have a model for how it will actually function. Because I’ve never done this before, I don’t want to just say “Here, try this” and leave you to it. I want to learn with you what works and what doesn’t so I’ll participate with the folks who want to engage in spiritual formation in this way. -Mary Linda
The face-to-face spiritual formation groups will meet monthly for roughly 2 hours. Each of us is choosing to meet in this online space due to a variety of factors, some of which include busy-ness. You may not have 2 extra hours each month. Please try to prioritize reading the posts of others whenever you are able. Share from your own experience at least once each month. Intimacy in online community can be hard to build, challenging to maintain, and difficult to trust. If we want this to be a emotionally and spiritual nurturing space, we each must be intentional and bring our fullest selves.
Some people want the opportunity to receive questions from the group that may help guide them to greater insight. Others want to share with the group without responses. If you do not want reflections or questions on what you share, please note that at the end of your post.
But if one of us has said they do not want questions or reflections, we may let them know we have read what they’ve written by replying with a simple “Thank you for sharing this” or “I’ll be holding you in the Light.”
To “listen” another’s soul into a condition of disclosure and discovery may be almost the greatest service that any human being ever performs for another. But in this scrutiny of the business of listening, is that all that has emerged? Is it blasphemous to suggest that over the shoulder of the human listener, there is never absent the silent presence of the Eternal Listener, the living God? For in penetrating to what is involved in listening, do we not disclose the thinness of the filament that separates person listening openly to one another, and that of God intently listening to each soul?
What is an honest, open question? It is important to reflect on this, since we are so skilled at asking questions that are advice or analysis in disguise; e.g., “Have you ever thought that it might be your mother’s fault?” The best single mark of an honest, open question is that the questioner could not possibly anticipate the answer to it; e.g., “Did you ever feel like this before?” There are other guidelines for good questioning. Try not to get ahead of the focus person’s language; e.g., “What did you mean when you said ‘frustrated’?” is a good question, but “Didn’t you feel angry?” is not. Ask questions aimed at helping the focus person rather than at satisfying your curiosity. Ask questions that are brief and to the point rather than larding them with background considerations and rationale—which make the question into a speech. Ask questions that go to the person as well as the problem—for example, questions about feelings as well as about facts. Trust your intuition in asking questions, even if your instinct seems off the wall; e.g., “What color is your present job, and what color is the one you have been offered?”